I Stand Corrected

Joel: Momma, why are we taking a bath right now?

Me: I'm tired and don't feel well and I thought you and Micah would like to play in the bubbles for a while. Momma is going to rest and watch you play in the bathtub.

Micah pours a large cup of water out of the bath, down the side and under the changing table.

Me: AaarrrGh!!! Micah!

Joel: Momma, it makes me sad when you talk that way. I know that you are sick, but I don't like for you to yell at Micah. I think we need to get out now. Maybe we can read a book and calm down.

I stand corrected.
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Joel: Momma, you need to put your shoes on before you take me to Thursday school.

Me: I am. Right now. (I'm putting lotion on my feet before I put on socks and tennis shoes)

Joel: What is that stuff? You need to get that off your feet!

Me: It's lotion. It's okay.

Joel: It will ruin your socks!!! Oh, NO! (He's practically dancing in anxiety for my socks.)

Me: It's really okay, Joel. My socks will keep the lotion from getting in my shoes and on the floor. It will make my feet soft.

Joel: Momma, it's not okay to ruin your socks. It will make it all mucky and God doesn't like that. You need to take care of your things because God doesn't like your lotion. He doesn't.

I stand corrected.
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Joel: Can we wake Micah up from his nap now?

Me: No, please don't wake him up, Joel.

Joel: I want him to play with me.

Me: He can play later. Is there a game you can play by yourself while I finish the dishes?

He runs off.... maybe five minutes go by.

Joel: I need you to get the animals down please. (I reach a higher toy self and give him a set of Noah's Ark animals.)

Joel: Oooo.... Yeah.... Oooo...WOOO Hoo!!!

On my way back to the kitchen, I follow him to the living room where he gets right down to play with the animals. I have maybe 5 more dishes.

A few minutes later I see that he has lined the anmials up in a semi-circle in front of him. He's fanning his legs and just barely missing the animals while he talks to them. "Do you want to play a game with me?" ... "Come on, lets play a game." ... ... "Please, play a game with me."

His final words before I burst into laughter were spoken in a demanding, slightly mob-like threatening voice with considerable bass for a two-year-old, "We will play a game now. I will knock you down." He proceeded to wreak havoc and distruction amongst his nice lineup of animals. In the course of the morning he also took certain animals to the doctor and then put all of them in a "cave" to sleep and recover from his "game".

Maybe you are not laughing right now. Maybe you had to be there. In truth, this was hilarious!